Ahead of their home opener in just under two weeks, the Tacoma Rainiers have unveiled a new addition to their ballpark menu they are calling the Diabetes Dog.
The Diabetes Dog, as the name suggests, is a hot dog that the Rainiers have topped with enough ingredients to give you diabetes before the ninth inning rolls around.
The footlong hot dog, placed inside of a bun made from King’s Hawaiian sweet bread, is topped with chili, melted nacho cheese, potato chip crumbs, bacon bits, sriracha sauce, pepperoni slices, black pepper seasoning, barbecue sauce, and Flamin’ Hot Cheeto fries. The $14.99 Diabetes Dog also comes with a small soda.
“We wanted to craft a menu item that would put the Rainiers on the map in the crowded minor league baseball landscape,” said Rainiers president Aaron Artman. “We thought, why not pick up where KFC left off with the Double Down. Why don’t we actively try to give those people who order this item early onset diabetes. We’re being transparent to our fans by naming it the Diabetes Dog. They know what they’re in for when they buy one.”
Artman says a limited amount of Diabetes Dogs will be made for each game so their entire fanbase doesn’t contract diabetes by the end of the season.
“We know that with great power comes great responsibility. I reckon fans from the entire Puget Sound region will flock to our games to see if they can eat this hot dog without contracting diabetes. It’s a challenge for these folks. There’s a lot of idiotic college kids out there. If we didn’t put in limitations then someone might actually try and eat two of these in one sitting. Our medical staff at Cheney simply aren’t prepared for what would happen to an individual who did that. I don’t know if any medical professional would be.”
Artman says the Tacoma Rainiers plan to roll out the Diabetes Dog during their home opener against El Paso on April 11th.