Team Name: Maine Red Claws

Alter Egos: Maine Rock Lobsters, Oregon Red Claws

League: National Basketball Development League (D-League)

True Rivals: Westchester Knicks, Ice Hockey, Cross Insurance Arena, Portlandia

Hometown: Portland, Maine

Home Venue: Portland Exposition Building – 3,100

Nearest Bar To Pre-Game At: Bramhall – 0.3 miles

Best Player Names: Andre Stringer (Kudos to the Red Claws for having a freelance journalist on their roster instead of paying a columnist an absurd amount of money for opinion pieces you could pay a professional blogger for and get 4x as many pieces for the same cost)

Worst Player Name: Ralph Sampson III (If I learned anything from Godfather, I would’ve rather signed Ralph Sampson or Ralph Sampson II instead of signing the third installment to the series)

Chances In A Nickname War: I don’t many teams who are nicknamed the Boiling Water Pots so they’ve got that going for them

Interesting Fact: Let’s settle this whole Portland, ME vs Portland, OR debate. Maine’s Portland was settled back in 1632 and took the name Portland officially in 1786. Oregon’s Portland meanwhile was founded in 1845 on account of a coin flip between the names Portland and Boston which were the former hometowns of the claim’s land owners. Ignoring the fact that there could be two different teams in the NBA named Boston on opposite sides of the coast, Oregon’s Portland has since grown to nearly nine times the size of the original.

Think of it like this. When you hear the term “12th Man”, what’s the first thought that pops into your head? One party of people will think of Texas A&M who originally came up with the slogan that was popularized at a local level and, according to the USPTO, owns the trademark for the slogan. However, another party of people will think of the Seattle Seahawks who have, over the past decade, made the slogan their own and popularized it on a national level that Texas A&M never truly accomplished. Who deserves to rightfully call their fans the 12th Man? It all depends if you’re willing to admit defeat or, much like patent trolls, willing to fight until the bitter end over ownership of something no matter how in the wrong you are just because there is monetary value to it.