A five-year-old baseball fan at yesterday’s Seattle Mariners game reportedly went the entire baseball game without bugging and irritating anyone in their immediate seating vicinity.
The young Mariners fan, who sat behind home plate in the upper part of Safeco Field, bewildered many fans sitting around them who expected to be bothered at least two or three times during the duration of the game. However, by the end of the ninth inning, nearby patrons were pleasantly surprised by the extremely rare occurrence.
“To be honest, I thought they were dead for a second,” said Heather Ott who sat directly behind the child. “By the fifth inning, I was wondering why an errant arm hadn’t been whipped into my kneecap yet. I was about to poke them to see if they were alive but then they spoke to their parent without sounding like a whiny brat. The whole situation caught me off-guard.”
Cam Ott, Heather Ott’s husband, was also surprised by the lack of irritation he endured during yesterday’s game once he discovered who was sitting in front of him.
“I’d say God is a fan of children not acting like they’re trying to get out of a straight jacket while sitting and watching the ballgame. In the sixth inning, a foul ball off the bat of Cano when straight to him. It must’ve been a sign. I’ve been coming to Mariners games for the past two decades and I’ve never had a foul ball be guided to me like that. Then again, when I was younger, I did fall on that toddler while going for a ball at an indoor football game. Bastard got hugs from the cheerleaders, in the end, for god sakes. Lucky him.”
While children have been recorded sitting respectfully and being mindful of their surroundings during an entire baseball game in the past, yesterday’s instance is the first report of such instance at a Mariners game since 2012.